Layla's first pair of ballet flats!
So within the last 8 1/2 months I have been through alot. I feel as though there is only a certain group of people who understand what exactly your body goes through during this time. I am talking about pregnancy. Thats right! The sweating, carpal tunnel, swelling everything, rashes, headache, body aches & fatigue. I have learned so much about myself, strangers, family, friends & everything in between. Besides all the struggles & the anxiety I am facing now I find myself at ease. I am so happy to be bringing in a child who will be unimaginably loved & cared for. Who will have a father who is sensitive, hilarious & an all around amazing person. I am so happy to be a mother who can do for her child no matter what. I can be lazy at times but when it comes down to it I am a hardworking, goal orientated person who gets things done. I didn't graduate from college for nothing! Brian & I haven't gotten along any better since we found out on that warm June night that changed our lives! Even though I do NOT want to leave the house & I am completely in my nesting stage I am really happy, excited, nervous, exhausted & full of emotions!!
With accomplishing one of the hardest goals I set for myself this year. I feel as though I can do anything. I graduated college. I know people wouldn't look as though FIDM is a hard school, I definitely beg to differ. Those 2 years were sooo hard! But well worth it. I basically put myself through school, I stayed up nightly doing projects & waking up at 5:30 in the morning. I would take the bus to a train ride with crazy people walk two blocks and make it! I did it. That's just the half of it. Not to mention the car accident, having to move out my house of 10 years & still dealing with my family. I still did it. It is the greatest feeling & that will never change.
There are many changes ahead with Layla Eleanor (yes that is her name) on the way. I feel as though I got this on lock down! With the help of supportive people & people who don't worry so much we can do this. I don't need people to worry I need them to to be supportive. I have to worry about myself and not others my whole life. I don't need anyone else to worry for me. I just need support!
I am a intelligent, strong willed, free spirited, wish beyond my years person. I have faith & so should others with what we can do.
Brian & I have grown up so much together. We push ourselves to do better & better everyday! We are there for each other & there is no one else who knows me better in the world. 4 1/2 years & going strong!
I cannot wait until this person I have carried around for months gets here. I am so proud of us. I love you Brian & our sweet precious baby girl, Layla.
We can do this.
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